A Message of Love and Inspiration: A Post-Mother's Day Post

I really hope that all the "Moms" of every kind had a wonderful Mother's Day!

I just wanted to share what my oldest boy wrote me in his Mother's Day card. I also hope that you will find this as inspirational as I do. I am not ashamed to admit that I cried when I read this:

 When god made men he said "they will be strong hunters and protectors." But when the goddes was up she said "even the strongest protectors need protecting" so from her own body she created mothers. To take care of the strongest worriors and protectors in their time of need. Nothing would be possible with out mothers. Mom you made me the man I am now my sister into the women she is, and my brother into the runt he is. We love you through the dark times, and the best of times. Forever and always your babies. Alexander Garcia

I left in all the spelling and grammatical errors on purpose. You see my oldest son has dyslexia and for him to write anything by hand is a struggle. He is a very intelligent young man who has battled with the embarrassment of bad grades and bad handwriting.

For several years I worried that he would never see a graduation day and that he would end up on the wrong side of the law. He was very stubborn and quick tempered. He had witnessed a very ugly divorce and all the drama that comes after. He is very protective, but still finds it hard to ask for help in many situations.

My Daughter drew this for me!

He has come a long way in a short amount of time. Sports gave him an outlet for his energies. Changing many of the people that he was hanging out with, helped to change his behavior (He still has the same best friend from the 6th grade though.) He has made many mistakes, but I can proudly say that he has learned from them and he has changed positively.

Alex will graduate with his class in less than two weeks thanks to the love and attention (and not to mention a lot of arguments and tears) from teachers, coaches, friends, and family.

He has a few goals set and very good plan for the future. He has come a long way with his life. A summer job is in the works, followed by him joining the military in the fall, and possibly a career in law enforcement afterwards.

A whole new world has opened up for my oldest son, because he changed the choices he was making.

What choices could you be changing to improve your life?

Wishing you all many Blessings and much Love,

Time Slips By Too Fast, A Mother's Thoughts

My oldest son had his Sr. Prom last night. He had told me about how a few friends and he had a conversation about how much they were going to miss each other. As he told me this I started thinking about his graduation coming up in a few weeks and his plans for the future.

He is a grown man but he will always be my little boy. He even saved my life once. (That story is for another blog.)

In two years his sister will be at this point and in four years his brother will too. They grow up too fast.

It seems like only last week that I felt this first stirrings of life in womb. I could have lost him at one point in the pregnancy, yet here he is my hero about to walk into the real world.

The usual parental thoughts pop into my head as graduation date looms closer: Did I prepare him enough? Did I teach him all he needs to know? Will he survive? Does he know that I am only a phone call away? Will he find the right woman? Will he have a great life? Will he have his own family?

The list goes on and on.

He truly is a wonderful man. I realize that he will stumble, get hurt, possibly get his heart broken, maybe even fail a time or two. I also comprehend that I have to let him walk his own road. I can no longer hold his hand and tell him what he should or shouldn't do.

I have some very sweet (and some not so sweet) memories of his childhood. I have more precious memories of my children's childhoods than my own, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

Watching my children growing up is a constant reminder that time is so fleeting. We are only here for a short time. There is so much world out there and only a limited time to live in it.

There is so much that I would have loved to do for and with my children, but it didn't work out that way for various reasons and I will not regret it. I will not regret the life that I have given my children up to this point because they would not be who they are now if events had gone differently.

I can still make memories with my family. I still have things to teach them. I still have stories to tell them. I still have a life to live with them.

Time slips by too fast, so we need to live each blessed day that we are given.

Are you living your life or just existing in it?

Are you ready to change?

"We have tomorrow, but we won't always have tomorrows."

Many Blessings and Much Love,
Andrea Faye

Feeding Your Soul

What do you do that feeds your soul? What makes your soul feel happy? Peaceful? Full? What brings out the song in your heart? Makes your feet dance?

It's very easy to answer those two questions for me.

For me its the following: quiet moments cuddled with my husband and kiddos, drives in the mountains, stepping into cold steams, meditating, rock hunting with my family, picnics by a river, camping, hiking, reading, writing, blogging, photographing, having a (some what) clean organized home, swimming, gardening, playing with the dogs, helping others, meditating, dancing, singing, talking to the Moon, sitting in the backyard and a few other miscellaneous activities.

That is a good example of what fulfills me. Some of the things that I do that feed my soul. Some of those are more important than others. Spending time with my kiddos is more important than cleaning house. I would rather be outside in Mama Nature then cooped up in a building. I'm happy walking in the mountains with my family, visiting old graves and ghost towns in the area.

Humans will remember to feed their bodies but will forget to feed their souls. Many people will forget to care for that unseen, important part of themselves the parts of our daily lives that make us smile, relax, breathe.

We are so used to living in such a hectic world, that we forget that we need those precious moments to download. We need to ground ourselves with those all too few moments that bring a smile to our lips, and a relaxation to our shoulders. We need to relax, just be, and just breathe.

Take the time to think about what you would do if you just had the time to do it. Realize those moments that calm you. Know what grounds your energies. Become aware of what recharges your batteries.

Now go do it!

It is that simple.

Make the choice to do it, and do it!

Let the dishes pile up for one night and go for walk in your neighborhood. Get the family to help with the dishes, then have a family movie night with everyone sprawled and cuddled on the floor.

I'll cut this blog short since my oldest has a sports banquet in an hour, and spending time with my family always feeds my soul!

Many Blessings and Much Love,

Andrea Faye

I'm Sorry!

Two very simple words that can mean so much.

"I'm sorry," is a sincere apology. Whether it's for bumping into another person or damaging another's property in some way. It is used to convey how much you regret the action that may have caused another to feel hurt.

"I'm sorry?" A polite attention grabber. It can be a simplified way of asking someone to repeat what they said. Said as the listener leans in to better catch what the speaker has said, in an almost intimate gesture.

"I'm sorry!" An angry or sarcastic retort. A way to inform another as to your displeasure of a situation or comment made. A simple phrase that can easily be spit out with loathing and derision.


It can also be a shield to hide a wounded heart. A meek response to lessen the attention aimed at the mutterer.

"I'm sorry," can easily become a way to mask insecurities. A way to almost apologize for the speakers very presence. A way to hide misery with an embarrassed smile. A sound that can convey so many insecurities in such a small phrase.

When a child stumbles and the first thing they utter is a mumbled apology, it seems adorable at first, but can escalate into an insecure response as the child matures. It can become a heartbreaking utterance to a caring parent or a small reward for an abuser.

"I'm sorry!" Can be a silent scream for help. Words said in the quiet fearfulness of lost hope. Words unspoken, screamed in the mind. A silent substitution for words unsaid or actions undone out of fear.

"I'm sorry," a tearful plea of forgiveness.

"I'm sorry." A simple statement of feeling unworthy of love, attention and gentleness.

"I'm sorry." My own daughter learned that phrase early and used it way to often. A sign of a traumatic childhood? Uttered to hide the emotional scars that covered her innocent mind?

So much anger, fear, resentment, abandonment, heartache, sorrow, loathing, shame hate in such a simple phrase.

To hear her small voice utter that phrase broke my heart time and time again.

She is growing into a very headstrong and opinionated young woman. The future woman slips into her still child like smile now and then. The opinions and words that spill from her lips hold the promise of a strong free thinker. She still slips those two little words it into her vocabulary now and then, mostly from habit...I hope but only time will tell.

This is my chance to say "I'm sorry," to my daughter and her brothers for not being able to step in the way of the recent heartache they faced. To say those words with full love in my heart and complete knowledge that I could not protect them.

Pain is the teacher we fear the most and sometimes a parent has to step back and let the heartache be learned. Life isn't always candy canes and roses, and pain must be felt to know the truth of situations.

So my darling perfectly-imperfect children, "I am so very sorry" that you had to suffer what you did, but I will always be here to be a shoulder you can cry on when the pain becomes to much to bear.

I'm sorry.

With Tears in my Eyes and Love in my Heart,
Blessings and Love,
Andrea Faye

Dedicated to my daughter who inspired the post and my sons. Lights of my life and loves of my soul.

Life, Death, Regrets, and Celebrations

My Grandfather passed into the Next World several days ago.

My family had warned me it was coming. I had felt the inevitable was nearer than several of my relatives wanted.

My heart is saddened but my soul is rejoicing.

It's a very bittersweet time when a loved one goes on to Heaven, joins with The All, dances back to the Summerland, returns to the Universe.

I am in mourning.

I am in mourning for the questions unasked, the stories untold. I am in sorrow for the chances missed to learn about his past and to delve into his wisdom. I will miss the entertaining versions of our family history and the laughs that we shared with him.

He was an example if a hard working, tough talking, gentle hearted man. I will celebrate the lessons he taught by his actions and gruff words.

He cared for his family as best he could. He never put up with bad manners. He expected us to love and cherish our families and friends. He experienced life fully and loved quietly. He regretted not leaving his family "more" but what we did receive was priceless.

Loved ones will leave us and we will eventually leave our loved ones behind.

It is inevitable.

It is the cycle of life.

Death is a reminder that we live. A nudge to experience, ask, talk, listen, go, grow, become.

Every passing of a loved one or friend makes me think of what I have done in my life and what I have yet to accomplish.

I won't mourn my grandfather, though I will miss him, but I will mourn all the times that I let opportunity pass me by. I will regret the chances that I did not take to sit and talk and ask all the questions I should have asked of him.

But I won't mourn him.

Instead I will celebrate his life. I will tearfully remember the love and gentleness he showered me with. I will consult the advice that he gave. I will laugh with the sound of his lectures deep in my heart. I will listen to the stories that are remembered in my soul.

I will celebrate My Grandfather by passing on what little bits of wisdom, stories, and lessons that I do recall.

Most importantly I will celebrate My Grandfather by living, loving, lecturing, and laughing.

Do you regret not talking to any of your relatives? Are there any questions you would ask them if you could?

New Year, New Beginnings

Take time to reflect on the past year. Revisit all those moments that made you laugh, made you cry, made you want to do it all over in a different way.

Now is your chance to let the past go and start fresh.

Here's how I'll be doing it:

1. Clean House
(My Kiddos are NOT going to like this one!)

I'm not supermom anymore and living with three teens, four dogs, four more miscellaneous pets/familiars, and Hubby...it gets messy around here. My new job hours have changed which is great for us as a family but it isn't so good for the housework. So today we are going to clean! Not a spotless clean, but a nice sparkly, free flowing of energy clean!

The Chinese have a custom of cleaning house on their New Year's Day. It cleans out all the old, bad luck energies from the previous year and welcomes in fresh, good luck for the new year.

So I will enlist my family to help me clean house! To sweep out the old to make way for the new!

2. Release
(This will be a hard, emotional one for my Kiddos.)

This is a twist on a journal exercise that I teach. This will be a family exercise that will bring up some raw and possibly unresolved emotions. We are going to write down anything "bad" that happened this past year. Each person will write as much or as little as they want. Free form is best.

We will not share these stories and we will have the option of being in the same room or going off to different rooms for privacy.

All pages will be folded and gathered together to be burned in a small ritual along with a few cleansing herbs, outside of the house. We will gather the ashes and release them off the property as well.

3. Cleanse
(Caution this could lead to fun and giggle fits!)

Cleaning the home does clear out most of the stagnant energies that may be lurking around, but to really get a good cleansing of energies we are going to use the four elements. It will be my take on a ritual that Silver RavenWolf has on her blog. Find her original ritual here! This ritual does wonders and using all four elements will let all the Kiddos participate!

4. Ground and Center
(Bring in the carbs!)

To bring the energy levels down and center us as a family we will have a family favorite dinner...Tacos! With a side of family time.

A nice simple way to bring us together as a whole!

5. Gratitude
(To start the new year right!)

We are going to have a "Gratitude Jar" for the family! A one gallon pickle jar will be repurposed for this. Over the next year we will put in little notes of any events that we are grateful for in the jar and we will share them at the end of the year.

A new family tradition...maybe!

6. Count Down

We will joyously celebrate the end of 2012 and welcome in 2013 with love!

Wishing You Many Blessings and Much Love for 2013!
Andrea Faye

Taking the Initiative

I was astonished, my first year in Idaho, at just how much snow could fall in one night. Every year since then I have noticed less and less snowfall.

This morning I looked out my window in hopeful anticipation of a "White Christmas" only to see the dull green grass and a clear blue sky. My Kiddos and Hubby were also disappointed.

We did the usual Christmas morning, present-opening-chaotic-mess-making-merriment. After all was picked up, tried on, played with and not put away, Hubby and I walked into the kitchen to make some food and talked about how pretty the mountains must be with all the snow up there...

...we put the food away...

...told Kiddos to bundle up...

...loaded into my wagon...

ROADTRIP!!!!

Yes we went on a Christmas Day Roadtrip into the mountains!

Just about 100 miles from home we found a beautifully white oasis to play in the wet fluffy stuff! Snow balls flew as soon as everyone got out if the car!

We even went out on the edge of the lake near by and skated on the ice! (It was the first for my Kiddos and I!)

We were exhausted, cold, and soaked by the time we stumbled back to the car.

We dusted off snow, kicked off footwear, peeled off socks, cuddled under blankets and blasted the car's heater.

We were red cheecked and red nosed happy!

We had so much fun we didn't remember to make a snow man!

We stopped at the first gas station found open and got hot chocolate for the Kiddos.

We listened to one of our audiobooks, enjoyed the scenery, and the Kiddos napped on the way back down.

We saw bald eagles, geese, ravens, deer. We examined animal prints in the snow by the lake.

We enjoyed Nature's bounty!

More importantly...we rook the initiative to GO and have the Winter experience we had wanted.

We went and did.

We Did Not sit and mope. We Did Not complain about not being able to do or not do.

We went and did!

We took the initiative of going where we needed to go and accomplished what we wanted to accomplish.

We took the initiative!

It was a magical few hours that almost didn't happen. Memories that almost didn't occur. A family milestone was almost missed!

Take the initiative in your life!