A Message of Love and Inspiration: A Post-Mother's Day Post

I really hope that all the "Moms" of every kind had a wonderful Mother's Day!

I just wanted to share what my oldest boy wrote me in his Mother's Day card. I also hope that you will find this as inspirational as I do. I am not ashamed to admit that I cried when I read this:

 When god made men he said "they will be strong hunters and protectors." But when the goddes was up she said "even the strongest protectors need protecting" so from her own body she created mothers. To take care of the strongest worriors and protectors in their time of need. Nothing would be possible with out mothers. Mom you made me the man I am now my sister into the women she is, and my brother into the runt he is. We love you through the dark times, and the best of times. Forever and always your babies. Alexander Garcia

I left in all the spelling and grammatical errors on purpose. You see my oldest son has dyslexia and for him to write anything by hand is a struggle. He is a very intelligent young man who has battled with the embarrassment of bad grades and bad handwriting.

For several years I worried that he would never see a graduation day and that he would end up on the wrong side of the law. He was very stubborn and quick tempered. He had witnessed a very ugly divorce and all the drama that comes after. He is very protective, but still finds it hard to ask for help in many situations.

My Daughter drew this for me!

He has come a long way in a short amount of time. Sports gave him an outlet for his energies. Changing many of the people that he was hanging out with, helped to change his behavior (He still has the same best friend from the 6th grade though.) He has made many mistakes, but I can proudly say that he has learned from them and he has changed positively.

Alex will graduate with his class in less than two weeks thanks to the love and attention (and not to mention a lot of arguments and tears) from teachers, coaches, friends, and family.

He has a few goals set and very good plan for the future. He has come a long way with his life. A summer job is in the works, followed by him joining the military in the fall, and possibly a career in law enforcement afterwards.

A whole new world has opened up for my oldest son, because he changed the choices he was making.

What choices could you be changing to improve your life?

Wishing you all many Blessings and much Love,

Seven Ways A Woman Can Be Open And Vulnerable In A Relationship

Ladies, have you ever been in a relationship that started with fireworks, romance, and late night talks? Everything was all roses and champagne? You settle in and settle down into what you believe is going to be years of sublime domestic bliss!

Then life interrupts your blissful delusions and reality comes crashing in.

Weekends with you becomes weekends with the boys. He used to bring you roses and chocolates and now he wants you to bring him beer and chips. Going out to dine at fine restaurants has become drive-thrus or fast-food delivery.

We forget that men are a different form of our species. Their thought patterns do not match our own. Men are logical creatures, while we women are the emotional ones.

We get frustrated and fed up with what we think is our man supposedly ignoring our wants and needs. We expect men to know...but we never tell them directly, we just drop hints. Or when we actually ask them to do something and they actually do it (or they attempt to predict what we want or need), but it isn't exactly to our specifications, we belittle and criticize them.

Men are such wonderful beings most of the time, yes they can be exasperating. They really do want to see us happy, they just don't understand the way we think.

If we try to tame them with anger, silence, callousness, cruelty, harshness, severeness, nagging, belittlement, or any other negative "training" then we risk loosing that special spark that attracted us to them in the first place.

So I am going to help you out, Ladies. I am going to help you get his attention by being open and vulnerable without being a ditz! When we learn to be open and vulnerable then the man can feel like, well a man!

• Be Sincere.

With every piece of advice I am about to share, the most important part of it all is BE SINCERE! If you truly care for your man, and respect your self, then BE SINCERE! Everyone of these steps should come from the heart, because if you really want to strengthen the bond between your man and you then BE SINCERE!

• Talk to him.

Men enjoy when you are interested in what they like. Ask him to explain his favorite sport, teach you about his hobbies, or what he likes most about his career. If you lack the inclination to truly understand then find something that you both already have in common and talk about that instead. If you really desire to learn more about his interests and are afraid that you may still not understand what he is telling you then don't be afraid to take notes and ask detailed questions. Really listen to what he says.

Find the moments when you can talk to your man. Tell him about your dreams, your favorite things, your experiences, your life, your sexual preferences, while your both cooking dinner, driving down the road, during, out for a walk. Have a lazy Saturday morning, bring him coffee in bed and sit or snuggle and talk. He really does want to know what makes you tick. Just find a good time to talk to him when he is not distracted by other things and be observant about whether or not you do have his attention.

• Touch him.

Men love to feel your skin against theirs. Most men really enjoy physical contact from their lover. When you are passing each other in the hallway, stop him and give him a quick kiss. If he's shaving, watch him and touch his cheek when he's rinsing off the blade. Give him a hug from behind while he's washing dishes. Hold his hand when your in the car. Snuggle on the sofa while watching t.v. Play footsie at the dinner table.

Don't be afraid of public displays of affection either. Being public and sharing some affectionate touching does not have to be raunchy. PDA's let your man know that you aren't afraid to shown the world that you are with him, and it gives him a chance to lay his claim on you also (His inner barbarian will grunt in appreciation!). Hold his hand if your out walking. Hug him when your standing in line somewhere. Give him a quick kiss whenever you get the chance.

• Say "Thank you".

If he goes out of the way to do something he usually doesn't, be sure to tell him thank you. Especially if he does that something without you nagging him or putting it on a "honey do" list. I don't care if he doesn't do it half as good as you would have, tell him thank you.

Be sure he knows how much you appreciate everything he does for you, from the expected to the unexpected. If he brings you flowers but they are the ones you hate, tell him thank you. Men cannot read a woman's mind, they can only guess at what we mean when we tell them what we want if we aren't very detailed in our explanations (This is where the "Talk to him." comes in handy!). He will mean well and he will be eager to do more for you when you tell him how much you appreciate his efforts with a simple thank you.

• Say "I am sorry".

We all make mistakes. We are humans living imperfect lives. We will do or say the wrong thing at one time or another. Telling your man that you are sorry shows that you trust him enough to open your emotions to him when you are in the wrong. Telling him "I am sorry" when you are in the wrong, shows him that you value his feelings.

Saying "I am sorry" also shows him your vulnerable side. It reminds him that you do need, and want him in your life. That simple phrase can and will make him feel more manly which will in turn entice him to show you how much he appreciated your femininity.

• Get naked during the day.

This is usually the hard one for most women. We aren't all gifted with "perfect" bodies, but believe it or not your man will not care what the "world's idea of perfection" is. To him you are perfect! Being naked with your man, during the day, definitely ranks high on the vulnerable list and it is a tough one to do, no matter your age or body type.

Close the blinds (or leave them open if your adventurous!), and run around the house in your birthday suit. Take a shower or a nice long, hot bath together. Read a book together or play on your laptops in the buff. Not too comfortable with that, them wear one of his shirts and nothing else, or even a sarong alone will work too. Still too shy, then snuggle on the sofa or floor under a blanket and watch a movie.

• Smile!

The man you are with wants to see you happy. He really does love to see a smile on your lips. He especially wants to be the one who made you smile. Not too sure about that, then wait until you are across the room from one another and smile at him. Really smile for him and see how he reacts (Caution: his reaction may cause you to blush!).

Smiling opens us up to joy and love. It is a way of reminding us that we are happy and vibrant beings. It energizes the heart and soothes the soul. Smiling changes our energies and the energies of those around us. Smiles are very contagious and life changing.

Try any or all of these steps and watch your man become more attentive and loving.

This are simple little things that we can do for our men to remind them, and us, just how much we do appreciate them. Men are genetically and instinctively set to be the providers and protectors, any one of these maneuvers will help to reinforce his innate instincts. Once your man feels more manly, then he will be very inclined to treat you like the lovely lady that he fell in love with.

Being open and vulnerable will strengthen the bond of love that you share.

If this still seems daunting then I will gladly work with you privately on how you can open up and maybe even spice up your relationship.

Blessings and Love,

Cherish Those Little Moments

Tomorrow, like most mornings, will drive my kids to school and it is usually a great way to start the day. We laugh. We talk. We renew our familial bonds. It has become a tradition, if you will. It is a few minutes for us to talk, argue, laugh, or just sit in silence. No matter how we spend those 10 to 15 minutes, we are connecting.

It is a simple little thing for me to drop off my kids on my way to work. It is one of those many little moments that occur in my life that I am learning to be present in. It is one of those little things that I do with my kids that will count in the long run for them and for my self.

Our lives are full of those little moments that just flitter by and will disappear without notice if we are not present in them.

How often, and think real hard on this, have you had one of those moments with someone and you wish that it could have lasted longer? Gone differently? Or worse yet how many of those little moments have you forgotten?

Those precious little moments in our lives are very easily lost in our memories. They can sneek in at some later point in our lives when we least expect it. Just a brief flash of memory that can bring back a flood of emotions and possibly some "what-ifs".

How often have you thought of taking time to do something special for yourself and just let that moment pass you by? Yes, we do have little moments that could be used to better our relationship with our selves as well.

Each one of those little moments can strengthen relationships with those around us. Whether they are with family, friends, ourselves, coworkers or even strangers. A friendly smile, an "I love you", a warm hug, a shared laugh, or any other form of communication during one of those little moments can change someone's day and maybe even their lives.

Take the time today to be aware of those little moments. Being aware of them can change your perspective on how you interact with other people and yourself.

Make the choice to be present and enjoy those little moments that are blessings in themselves.

Blessings and Love,
Andrea Faye

Time Slips By Too Fast, A Mother's Thoughts

My oldest son had his Sr. Prom last night. He had told me about how a few friends and he had a conversation about how much they were going to miss each other. As he told me this I started thinking about his graduation coming up in a few weeks and his plans for the future.

He is a grown man but he will always be my little boy. He even saved my life once. (That story is for another blog.)

In two years his sister will be at this point and in four years his brother will too. They grow up too fast.

It seems like only last week that I felt this first stirrings of life in womb. I could have lost him at one point in the pregnancy, yet here he is my hero about to walk into the real world.

The usual parental thoughts pop into my head as graduation date looms closer: Did I prepare him enough? Did I teach him all he needs to know? Will he survive? Does he know that I am only a phone call away? Will he find the right woman? Will he have a great life? Will he have his own family?

The list goes on and on.

He truly is a wonderful man. I realize that he will stumble, get hurt, possibly get his heart broken, maybe even fail a time or two. I also comprehend that I have to let him walk his own road. I can no longer hold his hand and tell him what he should or shouldn't do.

I have some very sweet (and some not so sweet) memories of his childhood. I have more precious memories of my children's childhoods than my own, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

Watching my children growing up is a constant reminder that time is so fleeting. We are only here for a short time. There is so much world out there and only a limited time to live in it.

There is so much that I would have loved to do for and with my children, but it didn't work out that way for various reasons and I will not regret it. I will not regret the life that I have given my children up to this point because they would not be who they are now if events had gone differently.

I can still make memories with my family. I still have things to teach them. I still have stories to tell them. I still have a life to live with them.

Time slips by too fast, so we need to live each blessed day that we are given.

Are you living your life or just existing in it?

Are you ready to change?

"We have tomorrow, but we won't always have tomorrows."

Many Blessings and Much Love,
Andrea Faye

A Personal Story of Finding Strength

Standing under the steaming hot water in the shower last night, I felt a tightness in my throat as a tear rolled down my cheek.

An image had popped into my head of a young girl giving herself a sponge bath. Two large bowls of precious hot water and a sort of bucket under her feet. She was so careful about spilling as little of the water as possible, as she washed herself. Standing in a cold shower in an even colder bathroom.

She had heated the water one pot at a time. She stood there shaking and shivering so hard that she had to keep her mouth clamped painfully closed. She had done the same mediocre bathing ritual to her younger brothers an hour before.

They were tucked into her bed, curled around each other for warmth, sleeping so soundly. She had found them all the extra blankets that she could. As soon as she would dry off and get dressed, she would crawl into bed with her siblings and keep them as warm as their shared body heat would allow.

That young girl was me.

Growing up, my family had some hard times.

I remember that winter so well.

No money for propane to heat the house or the water. Having to boil water for makeshift baths and washing dishes. I ate a lot of white rice and beans that winter, so my brothers could eat better. Walking to school, because I was too embarrassed to ride the bus, consequently being tardy a heck of a lot. I got teased about my clothes and my hygiene. No one knew the truth. No one cared to ask.

I've gone back to visit that young girl, in meditation.

I hold her, tell her I am so sorry for what she is going through. I tell her that someone knows now. I wipe her tears with mine as I share our pain, because I had to be so strong then. My brothers never saw me cry. I had to be strong for them. 

I have always had to be strong.

I have always had to.

For someone else.

Now I am strong for me.

I am still strong for others, I have a family after all, but it is a different strength.

I strive to be successful, because I have lived with the strength of sacrifice.

I live a life filled with love, because I have experienced strength during pain.

I am grateful for the good in my life, because I have been the strength in destitution.

I see others with an open heart, because I discovered my strength in ridicule.

I listen with my heart, because I was the strength of silence.

I give my smile easily. I listen without judgement. I speak with love.

I am very open and honest about my life and my self, because I am strong enough to.

I am a Mother. I am a Woman. I am Strong.

Are you strong?

Blessings and Love,

Andrea Faye

Meditation 101

Read the next paragraph and do as instructed:

Close your eyes. Inhale to the count of 4. Hold for 3. Exhale for 8. Repeat this 4 times. With each inhale feel your body relax. Stay relaxed, breathing slowly, with your eyes closed for about 60 seconds. Don't fight any stray thoughts that pop up. Just acknowledge them and let them go. When you are ready, once again inhale, hold, exhale in the beginning pattern and repeat 4 times. Open your eyes and stretch.

Congratulations! You just did a mini meditation.

Meditations come in many lengths of time and can be done in many ways.

There are three main forms of meditation: Active, Inactive and Inactive-Active.

Active Meditation

   This form of meditation is the least talked of except by practitioners of Yoga, T'ai Chi, Qi Gong, other types of martial arts, and other physical activities where the mind does not have to present with the body.

   What too many people don't realize, and utilize, is meditation while doing other physical activities. Have you ever meditated while vacuuming, washing dishes, washing the car, singing a lullaby as you rock your baby to sleep, folding laundry, or any other "chore".

   Meditation while you are doing something that requires a minimum of thought process is very relaxing and eases the stress and anxiety of having to do "chores" that seem time consuming, boring, and possible irritating. You can either let your mind wander or do some concentrated thinking on a specific thought.

Inactive Mediation

   This is the most common form of meditation and yet it is the hardest to practice. It takes a lot of practice to sit, lay or stand as still as possible and to train the mind to quiet.

   This is a very calming form of meditation that can lead towards some astounding insight and awakening. It takes a heck of a lot of dedication to become adept at this meditation but it is so worth the time and effort. 

Inactive-Active Meditation

   This is the easiest of the three meditations. This form of meditation is where you sit, lay or stand as still as possible but let your mind wander where it will, turn a specific thought into the point of meditation, listen to music or a guided meditation.

   Letting the mind be occupied in some form makes it easier to keep the body still.


Meditation doesn't take any special equipment, just a place free of distraction and a willing participant.

Meditation in any form is a dedication to the mind and spirit. It is a way to delve deep into the soul and teaches you to discipline the mind and the body.

Meditation helps us to discover the answers to the questions and problems that plague our mind. Meditating opens our minds to living better lives. Meditation renews our connection to that which we hold sacred.

Meditating eases the mind as it strengthens it. Meditation will also open up your intuition.

When I do meditations with clients I do request that they try to have a good nights rest and be well hydrated. Just before the meditation class they should have eaten a light snack and have used the restroom. I do ask that my clients have something that they can take notes with, you never know what messages and insights might come through, I also ask that they have some water or other light refreshment to help ground them back into reality.

Meditations are as easy or difficult as you make them.

If you would like to participate in one of my meditation classes, in person or by phone, then feel free to contact me by email at breathingharmony@gmail.com.

7 Ways to Re-Motivate Yourself After a Personal System Shutdown

Sit in a nice quiet spot and close your eyes for a few moments and listen. Listen to all the jabbering that goes on in your head.

The stress and worry of a normal everyday life comes in loud and clear. All the "to-do's", bills, work issues, family stuff, everything that goes on in your daily life will just fill your head with so much noise as it all vies for your attention.

It really is enough to make you just want to curl up under a blanket and hide from it all. You become so exhausted from all the stress of just thinking about everything that you need to get done, let alone trying to do it all. You lose your motivation and you just shutdown.

Throw in one of life's bigger setbacks, say a death of a loved one or a break-up, and you not only shutdown you down right shut yourself off from the rest of the world.

If and when you decide to come back on-line with the the still plugged-in, live in HD world you may feel lost, unmotivated, and possibly depressed. Your life is still waiting for you, and usually your ignored issues have piled up even more mountainous than you may want to acknowledge.

Living in today's fast paced, bill accumulating, keeping up appearances, highly distracting world can leave you so drained.

So how do you reset and re-motivate yourself?

Simple:

• Meditation
• Visualizing the Outcome
• Setting Priorities
• Journaling
• Talking to a Friend
• Reading Something Inspirational
• Just Start Moving

We have all heard of these tried and tested methods. They do work. We know that they do. We have all tried these at some point and time in our lives and they do pull our motivations back into focus for a time.

We do great, we begin to accomplish, life gets brighter, we dance through life, until we take one misstep, and falter for some personal reason. We drop the method we were doing so good on. We shutdown again only to try the next one and repeat the cycle.

We are all guilty of this at one time or another, but we know that all these tactics do work. Most people just never seem to keep up with them for very long.

This is why life coaches are so great to have. They help to keep you on track. They have no other reason to keep you going and motivated than to see you become the best You that you can be.

Life coaches will use some of the methods listed above as well as other methods that they have tweeked in some way. Life coaches help to keep you on track with accomplishing a better life and realizing your dreams.

So if you really need to get motivated to get your fanny into action, try any of the methods listed above to help you start something great in your life.

3 Ways To Set Daily Intentions In A Hectic Workplace

We have all heard or read that setting daily intentions will improve the way our day will flow. It sounds so very easy.

Wake up. Stretch. Set your intention for the day. Get out of bed. Continue with your day with ease and grace.

Easy.

Right?

Wrong.

I have found that unless I stay home, my intentions will get shot down almost as soon as I get to work. No matter how solidly I set my intentions, the energies at work will skew my intentions. They won't be totally demolished, but just pushed off center just enough to throw me off kilter.

I really do like where I work and the people that I deal with on a daily basis. The big problem that I have is that there is such a hectic jumble of energy flowing around from all the people and objects. It can feel so energetically chaotic that I just want to hide in a hole or sit by a river.

I cannot hide from the world. I have a duties and responsibilities that I cannot ignore. So it can get very frustrating to set a wonderful intention for the day and watch it get diluted by the hour.

So I've learned a few tricks to help me keep my intentions clear throughout the day. Let me share three of my favorite ways.

1) Use Action Words in a Simple Phrase

I got this idea when I was making my "to do" list in my planner. I am more likely to get tasks done if I write my "to do's" with simple action words if I am doing them at that moment. 

For example:

• Finish blog post.
• Wash car.
• Clean Alice's cage.

The idea does take some getting used to, I will admit.

Some daily intentions I have used are: 

• Live happy.
• Share your smiles.
• Love easily.
• Listen with your heart.

2) Drink in Your Intentions

The reason that I use simple phrases for intentions is that I am constantly reminding myself of what they are by literally drinking them in.

Every time I get a cup of coffee or a glass of water I will take a few seconds to whisper my intention into the liquid and then I drink it in. I am constantly reaffirming my intention every time I whisper it and I am anchoring the intention into myself ever time I take a drink.

Today's call to Universe and a quote.

3) Write It Down Where You Will See It

I am using a paper planner again. I find it easier to keep myself organized and on track. There is a section on the daily inserts titled "phone calls" that I use as my "phone call to Universe".

This is where I write down my intention and to cement it I also add a quote. Every time I open my planner I see my intention and I repeat it.

Before my planner, I would write it on a post-it note and place it on the bathroom mirror. I have even typed them on the welcome screen on my phone.

Writing it down helps to ingrain the intention into my mind and repeatedly seeing it helps to remind and reinforce it.

These are just three of the ways that I set my daily intentions into a hectic workplace so that they remain clearer throughout the day.

It is a matter of reminding your self throughout the day of your intentions and finding ways to cement them into your mind so that they don't dissipate.

Fear, Part of The Darkness-Within

Friend, foe, teacher, adviser, companion. Fear is all these and more.

Trust it or hate it, either way Fear will always be a factor in your every day life. It is a part of your make-up. An integral part of the inner workings of the mind, part the Darkness-Within.

Fears that we face daily are innumerable. Fear of failure. Fear of accomplishment. Fear of change. Fear of stagnation. Fear of letting go. Fear of holding on. Fear of loss. Fear of gain. Etc...

We fear and we fear Fear for a myriad of personal reasons, yet Fear will always be with us. Fear is such a constant in our lives that we should learn to live with it, to stop ignoring or shutting it away, and to truly listen to Fear.

Yes,  we need to learn to be with Fear. Be open, honest and present with Fear.

Develop an understanding, if not a friendship with your inner Fear. Get to really know your Fear.

Who is your Fear? Why does your Fear do or say what It/She/He does?

Let me give you a glimpse of who my Fear is.

My Fear is a petulant teenager full of anger and sometimes hate. She doesn't mean to be that angry but She has had a lot of promises broken and She has felt a lot of hurt. She is really just a scared little girl. A little girl that doesn't want to be hurt. A little girl who has a lot of scars.

She can screech like a banshee. She can whisper tearfully. She can beg and whine. She can be loud, obnoxious, and very rude.

She doesn't mean to stop me. She really just wants to warn me. If I don't acknowledge Her, She can and will get louder than my Intuition. She will get louder in order to get attention, just like a teenager will. She just wants to be heard, just like a teenager. She will say very nasty things to get my attention, just like a teenager.
She can learn to trust me as I can learn to trust her. She can learn if I am gentle with Her and acknowledge what She has to say. I have to treat this part of my Darkness-Within as I treat my own children.

I will not stifle Her nor shut Her away. She is the part of me that helps to me stop and analyze the next step I am about to take in my life and why I am doing, saying what I do. She is the reminder that  I should be very aware. That I need to be present in my life.

Learn who your Fear is. Talk to your Fear. Do not fear your Fear any longer.

I can help you find out who your Fear is and why He/She/It does what it does or says.

Are you ready to look into this part of your Darkness-Within? Are you willing to know your Fear?

Blessings and Love,
Andrea Faye

2014: I Claim My Life Purpose!

That is one heck of a bold statement to make!

How can I make such a bold claim?

When I have gifts that I am not utilizing to their fullest extent. I am an empathic and certified intuitive, but I have a tendency to shy away from attention.

When I have been blessed by some beautiful teachers and yet haven't honored their teachings by sharing their knowledge with enough people.

My Life itself has presented me with some of the hardest lessons and blessed me with some of the sweetest gifts.

As a mother, I have experienced the truth of patience and understanding. As a woman, I have found the healing powers of love and inner strength. As a human, I have learned that compassion and forgiveness can change my world.

I have re-discovered my connection to Source and I know that I can help others find and feel that connection.

I know I can help others to heal, forgive, and find their own connection to Source. That Is My Life Purpose!

This is the year that I step out into the open, be present with who I am, and embrace who I am ment to be.

I Claim My Life Purpose!

Are you ready to claim your's?

2014: New Year, New Beginning

A New Year is upon us.

The excitement of a new beginning is spreading around the globe.

People are eagerly preparing for parties. Possibly starting up resolutions that a few will follow through on and too many will, unfortunately, lose interest in quickly.  

Take a few moments to look back on the last year. Face the hurts. Celebrate every ecstatic moment. Give thanks for every blessing and every lesson.

Did you live, love, experience?

Our did you just watch, wish, wait?

Celebrate the passing of the old year and welcome in the new year.

Be safe and have fun.

Wishing you all a wonderful New Year!

Blessings and Love,
Andrea Faye

Feeding Your Soul

What do you do that feeds your soul? What makes your soul feel happy? Peaceful? Full? What brings out the song in your heart? Makes your feet dance?

It's very easy to answer those two questions for me.

For me its the following: quiet moments cuddled with my husband and kiddos, drives in the mountains, stepping into cold steams, meditating, rock hunting with my family, picnics by a river, camping, hiking, reading, writing, blogging, photographing, having a (some what) clean organized home, swimming, gardening, playing with the dogs, helping others, meditating, dancing, singing, talking to the Moon, sitting in the backyard and a few other miscellaneous activities.

That is a good example of what fulfills me. Some of the things that I do that feed my soul. Some of those are more important than others. Spending time with my kiddos is more important than cleaning house. I would rather be outside in Mama Nature then cooped up in a building. I'm happy walking in the mountains with my family, visiting old graves and ghost towns in the area.

Humans will remember to feed their bodies but will forget to feed their souls. Many people will forget to care for that unseen, important part of themselves the parts of our daily lives that make us smile, relax, breathe.

We are so used to living in such a hectic world, that we forget that we need those precious moments to download. We need to ground ourselves with those all too few moments that bring a smile to our lips, and a relaxation to our shoulders. We need to relax, just be, and just breathe.

Take the time to think about what you would do if you just had the time to do it. Realize those moments that calm you. Know what grounds your energies. Become aware of what recharges your batteries.

Now go do it!

It is that simple.

Make the choice to do it, and do it!

Let the dishes pile up for one night and go for walk in your neighborhood. Get the family to help with the dishes, then have a family movie night with everyone sprawled and cuddled on the floor.

I'll cut this blog short since my oldest has a sports banquet in an hour, and spending time with my family always feeds my soul!

Many Blessings and Much Love,

Andrea Faye

Fear Is The Teacher

We all have fears.

Experiencing Ophidiophobia?

Fears come in all shapes and sizes and can cause myriad forms of reaction. 

While some fears can  seem silly or strange, others are All fears are very serious to those who experience them.

Fears can cause different reactions as well. Fears may cause nervousness, crying, laughter, or full out panic attacks. Fears can cause the "fight or flight" responses, such as running away or striking out. Fears may even cause some people to embarrass themselves by way of bodily functions.

Experiencing fear is not cowardice. Fear is the mind's warning system. It is your mind reminding you that something possibly dangerous or scary is about to happen based off the remembrance of a past (life) event that may have caused you pain of some kind. Fear is a hyper-sensitivity to certain situations or things. 

If we acknowledge what we fear and learn why we fear what we do, we can overcome it's hold on us. We may still experience a twinge of fear, but you won't have the same strangle-hold that it once did.

Let me walk you through a personal story.

I have many fears and some I have had to face by force and others I have chosen to face in little steps.

One of the fears I have is a fear of heights, otherwise known as Acrophobia.

As a small child I used to have a recurring nightmares. In one of these I was getting ready to sit down at the very top of the huge metal slide at the park where I played at. All of a sudden I would fall off and as I was falling the slide, as I was falling past, turned into very large, old stone bricks and I could almost hear waves below me. The stone bricks would become the rocks of a cliff and the waves would get louder. I would see the grass of the park rising up to meet me, but I could almost see waves crashing in the grass, almost like a memory in my dream. Just seconds before I was about to crash into the grass, I would barely start to taste, smell, and feel salt water, I would startle and jerk awake.

A past life coming back to warn me?

Or just a coincidence that I also have a fear of heights?

I have tiptoed around this fear most of my life.

When I was younger I would tease myself with this fear. My dad was hospitalized several times when I was growing up. When I would go visit my dad in the hospital, he would usually be placed in one of the top floors. I would purposely lean on the windows and look as far down the building as I could. I used to love getting on the higher, scarier rides at carnivals. I used to love to sit at the very edge of cliffs.

I used to love that hair raising tingle when the fear would buzz through me. The adrenaline rush I would get was so stimulating.

Now as an adult I take my fear more seriously. Yes, I do think that it is based on a past life experience. Suicide or murder? Either way a fall that resulted in death, I am most certainly sure.

I experience Acrophobia.

I still tease myself with my fear. I love going on nature walks in the high country and going for hikes or drives on back roads in the forested mountains

The picture you see is of my son holding my hand. He is walking with me across a train trellis. It is maybe 30 feet above the ground, but it does make me a little nervous. He knows this and so he reached for my hand to help me get across. He tried telling me not to look down, which of course I had to do so I could make sure I didn't step in one of the openings between the ties.

We not only made it safely across, but he held my hand as we crossed back when our little nature walk was over.

We face our fears everyday and it should not be a daunting task. It does help if you have someone who is willing to hold your hand and guide you across the precipice. It helps if someone is willing to help you take those small steps. It helps when someone is there to encourage you to continue moving when you happen to look down and see just how far you might fall. It is very rewarding when someone goes the whole way with you and celebrates with you when you reach the other side.

Blessings and Love,

Andrea Faye

Contest, Contest, Contest 001

My first contest ever and it will not be the last!

I will be giving away 3 one-hour intuitive readings to celebrate my four year anniversary as an Ordained Minister.

All those who want a chance need only go to my Facebook page here. (Yes, it is one of those!)

I will write down all the names of those who follow the directions on the contest post. Each of my kiddos will draw a name and I will contact the winners on Facebook. Deadline is May 26th!

Each intuitive reading will be over the phone. I will pull 30+ cards in a spread that I designed myself and I will pull 3-7 items from my "hodge-podge" bag.

If  you cannot wait or know someone who would really love an intuitive reading go to my Intuitive Consultations page on this blog here. I offer a 30 minute reading as well as the 1 hour reading that is in the contest.

Please enter for your chance to win a free intuitive reading with me.

Hurry deadline is May 26th!!!


Blessings and Love
Andrea Faye

Reacting to Gossip

Life is a constant give and take of experiences.

Life/Spirit gives us ample opportunities to evolve, become, grow, change. We must choose to act and interact. We must decide what to say and do. We even have to decide what not to do.

Sir Issac Newton was right. "For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction." This scientific law can be applied to life as well. We have to embrace that we can control most of our life and all of our reactions. We need to be aware that others may be effected by our actions. We must be very conscious about the fact that we cannot control the reactions that others will have to our actions or in-actions.


We may not always see the consequences of our actions immediately, or maybe never even see them at all, but there are always consequences...reactions to everything we do or don't do. Say or don't say.

There is an unfortunate truth: the happier, more abundant and more successful our lives become, the more others will experience pain, jealousy and fear in reaction to our growth.

Other people's reactions to our life changes are completely out of our control. We can bask in the positive energies of those who support our changing lives and we must learn to accept, but shield, from any negative energies that come from those who envy and fear our success.

There will always be someone who will talk behind your back. Someone who spreads rumors.  How are you supposed to deal with this verbal energy barrage and still live a harmonious life?

The easiest action to take against bad gossip is to ignore it. Snide comments, malicious gossip, bad talking and maligning of your reputation can all be ignored. Yes, ignore it. Walk away. Play deaf. Do Not react in any way.

The people who stoop to gossiping in any form are just exhibiting where or what is lacking in their own lives through their jealous phrases.

Don't think so?

Still believe that they are just being small minded and cruel?

Then pay attention to what is being said and by whom. I realize that I just contradicted myself here, but this is the tougher road to take. Listening to what others say about you, without reacting, and studying what is being said is not the easiest thing to do.

Whatever it is about you that they are being snide about will say so much about what they truly want from and in their own life. Don't pity them, but be aware of the smallness they are feeling by what they are saying.

Try not to stoop to gossiping about the other person in retaliation for their hurtful words.
It will only get petty and possibly abusive. Instead examine what they have been saying, it will speak volumes about how they really feel about themselves. See the jealous, fear based words for what they are. A form of pity and self loathing that they are experiencing by comparing your life to theirs.

Not too long ago one of my kiddos was feeling a little overwhelmed by what another child had been saying. There was some serious, malicious gossip being spread about my child. My first instinct was to rush to defend my kiddo, but I stepped back and talked to my son about what was being said and the possible reasons for it.



After facing down the gossiper, my son talked to him about some of the similarities in their lives.  Both the other boy and my son come from broken homes. The big difference was that the other child was in the middle of a vicious push-pull custody battle with the Mom and Dad  bad mouthing each other and trying to make the poor child choose sides. My son showed this boy genuine empathy and friendship and gave the other boy what he really needed at the time...an unbiased, sympathetic, knowing listener. Someone who had gone through something similar and come out ok.

My son is now friends with this other boy and has stood by him through several other emotional events.


Words can hurt, but words express.


Listen, with an open heart. 

Be compassionate.

You could make a friend.

You might even help that person become a better person.


Wishing you Blessings and Love,
Andrea Faye

A Leap of Faith

Everything needs to begin from somewhere.

A massive acorn tree
doesn't start out as a tree. It comes from a small seed.

Humans aren't born walking, talking, and full grown. (Ouch!) We start from a minuscule egg that is fertilized by a much smaller sperm.

Everything on this planet has started out from something small. A humble beginning.

When you make the conscious choice to change the direction that your life is going in, you usually have to take that first small step in the direction that you want to go in.

It's that first small step that is the hardest to take because it is a leap of faith.

Every negative thought imaginable will pop into your head as you begin to lift your foot off the ground.

They did for me.

For each small step I have taken. I have heard those voices. Those fear-voices.

They are scared and so will you when you take that first step. That small, giant leap of faith.

Yes you may stumble. I won't lie to you. I did. More than once. It hurts.

That is why I am here. To show you that it takes a small step to move beyond where your life is at. It takes a small step to get past our boundaries, our comfort zone, to reach for the life that we know we are capable of achieving.

If and only if we can see, hear, and acknowledge the fear-voices. If and only if we can hear them for what they are and let them go. Don't ignore them. Don't smother them. Face them and love them...and let them go.

To live a life of harmony we must start from a humble beginning and take that small step... that little leap of faith.

Blessings and Love,
Andrea Faye

I'm Sorry!

Two very simple words that can mean so much.

"I'm sorry," is a sincere apology. Whether it's for bumping into another person or damaging another's property in some way. It is used to convey how much you regret the action that may have caused another to feel hurt.

"I'm sorry?" A polite attention grabber. It can be a simplified way of asking someone to repeat what they said. Said as the listener leans in to better catch what the speaker has said, in an almost intimate gesture.

"I'm sorry!" An angry or sarcastic retort. A way to inform another as to your displeasure of a situation or comment made. A simple phrase that can easily be spit out with loathing and derision.


It can also be a shield to hide a wounded heart. A meek response to lessen the attention aimed at the mutterer.

"I'm sorry," can easily become a way to mask insecurities. A way to almost apologize for the speakers very presence. A way to hide misery with an embarrassed smile. A sound that can convey so many insecurities in such a small phrase.

When a child stumbles and the first thing they utter is a mumbled apology, it seems adorable at first, but can escalate into an insecure response as the child matures. It can become a heartbreaking utterance to a caring parent or a small reward for an abuser.

"I'm sorry!" Can be a silent scream for help. Words said in the quiet fearfulness of lost hope. Words unspoken, screamed in the mind. A silent substitution for words unsaid or actions undone out of fear.

"I'm sorry," a tearful plea of forgiveness.

"I'm sorry." A simple statement of feeling unworthy of love, attention and gentleness.

"I'm sorry." My own daughter learned that phrase early and used it way to often. A sign of a traumatic childhood? Uttered to hide the emotional scars that covered her innocent mind?

So much anger, fear, resentment, abandonment, heartache, sorrow, loathing, shame hate in such a simple phrase.

To hear her small voice utter that phrase broke my heart time and time again.

She is growing into a very headstrong and opinionated young woman. The future woman slips into her still child like smile now and then. The opinions and words that spill from her lips hold the promise of a strong free thinker. She still slips those two little words it into her vocabulary now and then, mostly from habit...I hope but only time will tell.

This is my chance to say "I'm sorry," to my daughter and her brothers for not being able to step in the way of the recent heartache they faced. To say those words with full love in my heart and complete knowledge that I could not protect them.

Pain is the teacher we fear the most and sometimes a parent has to step back and let the heartache be learned. Life isn't always candy canes and roses, and pain must be felt to know the truth of situations.

So my darling perfectly-imperfect children, "I am so very sorry" that you had to suffer what you did, but I will always be here to be a shoulder you can cry on when the pain becomes to much to bear.

I'm sorry.

With Tears in my Eyes and Love in my Heart,
Blessings and Love,
Andrea Faye

Dedicated to my daughter who inspired the post and my sons. Lights of my life and loves of my soul.

Choices and Suicide

Warning! This blog may contain triggers!  If you begin to have thoughts of hurting yourself or someone else, stop reading and seek immediate help.

Life is like hiking in the mountains. Some days the trail is smooth and easy to traverse. Other days it seems like every rock, rut, root, and boulder is jumping out trying to make you stumble and fall. The shear drops and severe heights will make you question why you do it. Why you keep going?

Ah, but the sceneries! The spectacular views can take your breathe away if you pay attention to what is around you.

Life is never easy, but it is worth the treacherous, often painful, hike...or is it?

Two people that I knew didn't think so. Life's twists and turns lead towards what they perceived as the end. They both made the choice to take that last step off the proverbial cliff.

They left behind a whole lot of heartache, lost loved ones, and so many unanswered questions.

We will never fully understand why they chose to take their lives. What decisions and sequence of events solidified the idea of ending it all.

One left a goodbye letter, one did not. That letter may explain some of the young man's reasons, but it can never explain the mixed thoughts and feelings of why he thought there was no other way. It can never touch the exact process of the pain and anguish. It will only leave more questions for those left behind.

I can never fully explain why someone would choose to end their life...I can only tell you why I didn't take mine.

When I was a young teenager I was raped. That mind numbing event brought to a head all of the physical and psychological abuse that I had been subjected to at different moments in my young life. My world had avalanched and I felt buried alive in my own head.

I was so ashamed of what had happened, what could happen again, that the thought of ending my life seemed like the only way to stop the pain and fear. To keep my mind safe from anymore neglectful emotional scars. To keep my body from being bruised from repeated sexual and physical violations.

I stood over the precipice. I looked down into the bottomless maw of black loathing, self hating, fear and anger. I resolutely reached for the device that would stop the world from hurting me again and again and again.

A sound froze me.

A simple snore.

My father's snore.

My family.

Sleeping.

Unaware that dark death stood under the same roof they peacefully slept in.

How could I do something so final to myself and hurt them so much?

Who would watch over my little brothers if i wasn't there? Help shield them from the ugly in the world. They were so young and this would shatter their innocence.

I wouldn't wake up to laughter anymore. My father's deep rumble of ease, peace, and contentment.

Instantly I became very aware that taking my life would hurt so many people. All my friends, all my family would wonder why. They would always wonder why. That unanswered question would haunt them and hurt them their whole lives.

I cried instead.

I yelled out my anger. I screamed out my fear. I was a ball of rabid rage.

I cried.

Every tear was a molten soulful cleansing of my heart and soul. Every salty drop was a warm reminder of every tear that would be shed for me if I killed myself.

I did think at one point that no one would care. That no one would miss me. They would just go on with their lives like I had never existed and they would be happier without me anyway. No one really loved me anyway...right?

They would care. They would miss me. They would go on with their lives bit that unanswered question would haunt them and they would never be totally happy...ever.

Love saved me. It wasn't my family's love for me that saved me.

It was my love for them.

The love that lived in my heart for my family and my friends saved me.

The love that I had for everything held me in this world.

My adolescent love for my pets, writing, music, walks, trees, life. It helped me stop.

The small beat of my heart that skipped for one second at the sound of a snore said "Love".

I chose not to kill myself. I chose to face the truth. I chose the tough hike of courage over the final step over the edge.

Yes, it took a lot of courage to live. It literally took a skipped beat to remind me that life is tough, but it isn't worth giving up.

I wouldn't be here now. Years of good memories helping to ease the hurtful ones. Years of living, experiencing, and loving would never have existed.

I didn't end my life because I chose Love over Death. My Choice was the hard road of Life and Love.

My beautiful, pain in the rear children wouldn't be alive. My husband wouldn't be next to me. My family would not be around me to reminding me daily that love heals if you let it into your life.

With all the pain and heartache I have gone through, I can honestly say that life is worth living.

It has been a very tough hike up this mountain called My Life. I still have ups and downs. I still stumble and occasionally twist my ankle on a misstep. I have climbed a boulder or two. Heck, I've even back tracked to take a different path. I don't know when I will reach the top of my mountain, but the view has been breath-takingly amazing the whole time!

Blessings and Love,
~AF~

If you are contemplating suicide or even just feeling lonely or depressed contact someone. There is always someone who will listen. A friend, family member or even a trained professional.

A few resources to try:

"No matter what problems you are dealing with, we want to help you find a reason to keep living. By calling 1-800-273-TALK (8255) you’ll be connected to a skilled, trained counselor at a crisis center in your area, anytime 24/7."- www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org

"The Trevor Project is the leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and questioning youth." The Trevor Lifeline 866-488-7386 - www.thetrevorproject.org

"When You Feel You Can't Go On
Let Someone Know Your Pain
National Suicide Hotlines USA United States of America Toll-Free / 24 hours a day / 7 days a week

1-800-SUICIDE 1-800-273-TALK 1-800-784-2433 1-800-273-8255

1-800-799-4TTY (4889) Deaf Hotline " - www.suicidehotlines.com (This site has state links as well.)

Life, Death, Regrets, and Celebrations

My Grandfather passed into the Next World several days ago.

My family had warned me it was coming. I had felt the inevitable was nearer than several of my relatives wanted.

My heart is saddened but my soul is rejoicing.

It's a very bittersweet time when a loved one goes on to Heaven, joins with The All, dances back to the Summerland, returns to the Universe.

I am in mourning.

I am in mourning for the questions unasked, the stories untold. I am in sorrow for the chances missed to learn about his past and to delve into his wisdom. I will miss the entertaining versions of our family history and the laughs that we shared with him.

He was an example if a hard working, tough talking, gentle hearted man. I will celebrate the lessons he taught by his actions and gruff words.

He cared for his family as best he could. He never put up with bad manners. He expected us to love and cherish our families and friends. He experienced life fully and loved quietly. He regretted not leaving his family "more" but what we did receive was priceless.

Loved ones will leave us and we will eventually leave our loved ones behind.

It is inevitable.

It is the cycle of life.

Death is a reminder that we live. A nudge to experience, ask, talk, listen, go, grow, become.

Every passing of a loved one or friend makes me think of what I have done in my life and what I have yet to accomplish.

I won't mourn my grandfather, though I will miss him, but I will mourn all the times that I let opportunity pass me by. I will regret the chances that I did not take to sit and talk and ask all the questions I should have asked of him.

But I won't mourn him.

Instead I will celebrate his life. I will tearfully remember the love and gentleness he showered me with. I will consult the advice that he gave. I will laugh with the sound of his lectures deep in my heart. I will listen to the stories that are remembered in my soul.

I will celebrate My Grandfather by passing on what little bits of wisdom, stories, and lessons that I do recall.

Most importantly I will celebrate My Grandfather by living, loving, lecturing, and laughing.

Do you regret not talking to any of your relatives? Are there any questions you would ask them if you could?

Don't Take It So Personal

As humans we take everything very personal.

It's our Ego-Mind's screwy filtering, or non filtering, way of keeping you going down the status quo road. The Ego-Mind believes that it is the center of the universe and everything revolves around it's magnificence. (Many Teens are prime examples of the Ego-Mind in action.) Ego-Mind can take any incident that occurs in our lives and justifies the incident by making it a personal attack on you.

Let me give an example.

My Hubby did a favor for a friend by taking a job for said friend. When Hubby went to dispose of some material, he was overcharged, which went towards the friend's business account. Hubby took it very personally.

I explained to hubby that it wasn't a personal attack on him. He of course argued that he was the one driving the truck at the time and that his word on the amount in the truck was ignored and explained away, extra was added on and thus an overcharge.

I expressed that his friend has made some waves in our small town (small town political bull really) and it will be inevitable that too many people will attempt to screw his friend's business over any chance they can. I also told Hubby that it wasn't a jab at him or even his friend really, but at his friends business.

The conversation started when the guy who had overcharged came into my work. He was nice and polite to me and Hubby even though there was a guilty vibe to his energies.

I let my Hubby know that he shouldn't take it personally. At my job I get verbally harangued about prices, the weather, coworkers' attitudes, product quality, the president, etc. Most of it is out of my hands, I can attempt to rectify some scenarios as much as possible, but most of the complaints are the results of feelings of unhappiness that the customers feel powerless about and I just happen to be the one the comments are aimed at. I don't take it personally and I brush off any negative energies after the exchanges.

I refuse to take on the negative energies unknowingly aimed at me. The clients are expressing their frustrations, angers, and fears. I just happen to bear the brunt of their energies because they are unsure of where to direct their energies which take the form of verbal complaints.

My Ego-Mind can easily take all those negative comments and turn them into personal attacks. I refuse to let it. I choose to see the complaints for what they are and let their energies slide away from my own energies.

I refuse to take it personally.

Even situations that are aimed at us personally, should not be taken...well...personally.

Another example:

My daughter was made fun of by another teenage gal for wearing something that wasn't in fashion at the moment.

My daughter faced the girl (and the rest of the little clique) and told them that they were just jealous that she had the cojones to wear something she knew she looked good in instead of copying what everyone else was wearing, whether it looked good or not. She turned around and walked away.

Flash forward a few weeks later and several in that popular clique have been seen sporting a similar look that my daughter had been picked on about.

We talked about the incident and my daughter had felt intuitively that the girl had really liked what my daughter had worn but was afraid to be different from her friends. The young girl had attacked out of her own fears, at someone who was showing courage, which happened to be my daughter.

Use your intuition to understand why you are the seeming target of a situation. What is the real reason behind the attack? Is it really personal?

How often have you taken something too personally?

Blessings and Love!
~AF~